There’s a quote by Henry Nouven that’s been echoing in me lately: “You don’t think your way into a new kind of living. You live your way into a new kind of thinking”
For most of my life, I believed change began in the mind – with strategy, planning, and achieving goals. As an Enneagram 3, I’ve often measured my worth by what I do, not who I am. But this past year, something has shifted.
I’m no longer chasing achievement. I’m learning to become. To live into new ways of thinking by doing, experimenting, and embracing the unknown. By honoring my values, following what calls to me, and taking each step — imperfect, tentative, joyful, and brave — as it comes.
From a place of vulnerability, what does this mean for me? I’m learning to follow the quiet call of curiosity, to take thoughtful risks where the focus isn’t on winning or competing or successful outcomes but learning. Some experiments succeed, some fail – and often, the failures teach me the most. I experience this regularly as I am becoming a wannabe cook!
I’ve also been learning to self-validate, rather than leaning on external approval. I pause to notice my own effort, growth, and intention, even when others may not see it. This has been liberating.
Portugal was a gentle teacher in this process. It reminded me of the value of presence: the coffee savored at a corner café, the long, unhurried dinners and the endless walks through winding streets. I’ve swapped my old habit of multitasking (something I was so proud of) for something new: being fully present, one thing at a time.
Living with an incurable cancer has shaped this perspective even more profoundly. It’s shown me that life isn’t about doing more or achieving more – it’s about being more: more curious, more courageous, more open, more real.
Maybe that’s what this quote really means. That it’s not enough to just adopt new thoughts, we must embody them. We must live into them consciously, one choice, one day, one courageous step at a time. This has been a transformational learning for me.
From a place of curiosity — what are you ready to live your way into?
What’s one small action today that could help you embody the change your heart is calling for?
