Cancer is probably one of the most dreaded words in the English language. I know that when I was diagnosed on February 3rd, my immediate reaction was, “will I live?”. Our initial web searches showed Multiple Myeloma patients survive no more than six months. As I learn more about cancer, I get more encouraged. In a wonderful book written by Dr. Robert Buckman, “Cancer is a word, not a sentence”, he states that if you have cancer, your chance of surviving it is 50% (UK statistics – 2006). That may not be as high a percentage as 80 or 90%, but it has been increasing steadily over the past four decades. Only six years after his book, Dr. Tiedemann’s research indicates a survival rate for Multiple Myeloma of 10+ years. And for someone like me who saw cancer as a death sentence at the outset, I am encouraged by this number.
I think part of our issue is we think of cancer as a big, scary disease — a monster ‘that cannot be named’. We find it difficult to talk about it, we have trouble hearing about it, and we are terrified by the thought of it. But when you peel away the layers of cancer, you realize there is a wide spectrum that exists in varying severities, with differing prognoses. As Dr. Buckman explains, a common type of skin cancer will not pose a threat to one’s life; however, an advanced cancer of the pancreas has a high probability of threatening one’s life. He advocates that cancers are medical conditions that we need to discuss openly, without fear or dread, “because, when you come right down to it, the word cancer is exactly that – a word, not a (death) sentence.”
In the first month after my diagnosis, I defined myself as an individual who had cancer. I moped around feeling a sense of despondency. I was teary-eyed. I would tell random people I had cancer. But in time, came acceptance, and with it a sense of calm, peace and resolve. And I have come to realize that yes, having cancer takes a lot out of you. My chemo treatment (R-CHOP) is brutal. In a one-month period, I spent 16 days in the hospital! I am fatigued many days. Sometimes, my only energy comes from prednisone.
But more importantly, there are a lot of things that cancer cannot do. My friend, Cindy Choleras, reminded me of this when she sent me this wonderful quote:
CANCER IS SO LIMITED…
It cannot cripple LOVE
It cannot shatter HOPE
It cannot corrode FAITH
It cannot destroy PEACE
It cannot kill FRIENDSHIP
It cannot suppress MEMORIES
It cannot silence COURAGE
It cannot invade the SOUL
It cannot steal ETERNAL LIFE
It cannot conquer THE SPIRIT
– Author Unknown –
I find this incredibly inspiring as I no longer define myself as a cancer patient, rather I define myself as an individual who has cancer. And there is a difference.
– Munira
